#35 I’ve Mastered Sleep

At first, the title “I slept myself to happiness” seemed very tempting because it is true. However, I was aware that some would assume I was referring to intimacy as a pathway to happiness. And while intimacy is a beautiful thing, the true meaning here is considerably less sexy. I found happiness because I’ve mastered sleep.

This Is Not A Sleep Guide

For those of you who are anticipating a “Five Steps to Sleep Mastery” article, I must disappoint you. With an abundance of material already available for our sleep-deprived society, the last thing anyone needs is another sleep article.

If you are struggling with sleep issues and seeking well-researched scientific insights, I recommend visiting the incredible Huberman Lab and reading his Toolkit for Sleep.

However, if you are interested in discovering how sleep has guided me to become the person I am today, then this article is for you.

The Basics: Why Is Sleep So Important?

Just like food and water, good sleep is vital for survival. Getting enough sleep at the right times helps your brain build and maintain pathways for learning and memory.

Moreover, sleep significantly influences various brain functions, including inter-neuronal communication among nerve cells. You could say sleep serves as a housekeeping function, expelling brain toxins that accumulate during wakefulness, as recent findings indicate.

The Four Stages Of Sleep

Sleep follows a pattern with four stages:

Stage NREM 1 is the light transition from wakefulness, with slower heart rate and brain waves.

Stage NREM 2 brings deeper sleep, reducing eye movements and body temperature.

Stage NREM 3 is crucial for feeling refreshed, with low heartbeat, breathing, and brain waves.

The last stage is REM sleep, occurring around 90 minutes after falling asleep. Rapid eye movements and increased heart rate characterize REM, where dreams happen, and limbs are temporarily paralyzed. REM aids memory consolidation.

These stages repeat cyclically in 90-120-minute cycles, with NREM comprising 75-80% of each cycle.

Brief wake-ups might occur, known as "W" stages.

My Favourite Sleep Stage: NREM 1

I’ve always been a “good sleeper.” And to confidently use the word “always,” I asked my mom if I ever had difficulties sleeping as a child. Her response was straightforward:

And this remains true to this day.

I can fall asleep anywhere and anytime when I´m tired. Even during challenging periods of my life, when grappling with worries and uncertainties, I never struggled with sleep.

My secret?

My love for NREM 1.

What Happens in NREM 1

Stage 1 sleep serves as a gentle transition from being awake to falling asleep. Your breathing and heartbeat slow down, your muscles relax, and your body cools down. All the things your meditation teacher tries to guide you through occur naturally in this stage.

Furthermore, your brain waves activity changes as well. NREM 1 is associated with both alpha and theta waves. As you progress through stage one, there is an increase in theta wave activity.

And during this phase, I’ve learned to let the magic unfold.

Theta Waves

Theta brain waves not only occur when we drift off into sleep but also when we are daydreaming, under hypnosis, or in a deep state of meditation. We are deeply relaxed and can be very creative and our imaginations run wild.

Dr Sarah Larsen

I’ve Crafted My Life Through Theta Brainwaves State

Let me explain this with one very specific example:

Around fifteen years ago, I joined a friend to Pilates, primarily because she didn’t want to go alone. At that time, embracing Pilates as a routine and certainly the idea of becoming a Pilates Instructor didn’t even cross my thoughts.

After a while, it began to happen that, often, when I went to bed at night and started drifting off to sleep, I would have a vision of myself standing in front of a class and teaching Pilates. I could see myself in the room, hear myself using the exact same words as my teacher, and feel the rhythm of each exercise, even though my body was lying in deep relaxation on the bed.

During this time, I still didn't consider the idea of becoming a Pilates Instructor while awake, but I already was one when my brain entered the theta brainwave state.

Programming Your Mind in Theta State

Many people who start their Pilates teacher training often face initial difficulties in delivering accurate instructions, and cues, a crucial aspect of Classical Pilates. In my case, it felt like I had been doing this my entire life.

This sensation emerged because I had already been “training” myself for several weeks, each time I entered the transitional state between wakefulness and sleep - the theta state. By reciting the words I had heard a few hours earlier in my Pilates class, I already programmed this knowledge into my brain.

I learned while falling asleep.

This incredible function of our brain not only helps us learn but can also assist in overcoming difficulties. Hypnosis capitalizes on this phenomenon. When you’re under hypnosis, your brain operates in the theta state. And with the guidance of a therapist, traumatic emotional memories can be rewritten by forging new neural connections.

But you don’t need a therapist to get yourself into a theta state and reprogram your mind. Just go to sleep.

I Don’t Meditate. I Sleep.

Every night, as I drift into sleep, I tap into my subconscious. I transition into NREM 1. This moment is something I absolutely love and have cherished since childhood.

Because this process allows me to connect with the things that genuinely excite me. It provides clarity about what I truly want.

At the same time, it empowers me to confront my deepest fears more easily because I can simulate scenarios being detached from reality, all from the secure haven of my bed.

I´ve Mastered Sleep

Today, I understand that any mental imagery that unfolds the moment I close my eyes at night deserves a closer examination. Because there is a good chance that within these visions lie answers to many aspects of real life.

Accessing the gateways to my inner self and observing, experiencing, listening, and fearlessly following my inner voice has become my key to happiness.

This is why I've mastered sleep.